God the vending machine

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Years ago, centuries it seems, in my early life, I had a strong and very strict religious training. You don’t earn the title “Brother” without going to the religious boot camp known as a “Novitiate”.

Obviously during that time, you not only study a lot of theology, but you are also introduced to many of the rules, regulations, and practices of the church, and in so doing also hear about the possible abuses of those rules and what some erroneously label acts of “devotion”.

You learn that what separates us from the lower species is the gift of free will, and you learn that with it, the use of the explanation for actions, “God’s will be done”, can become as much an excuse for bad decisions and actions as it is giving your life to God.

You also learn that when it comes to sin and the forgiveness of it, some see confession and repentance as proof that God is a celestial beatific vending machine who will conveniently dispense forgiveness, like soda from a machine, as many time as we go to the well, even if this becomes rather abusive.

It makes it so that people can commit sins as often as they so choose, but then, usually when it comes to convenience and expedience, announce to those who will buy it that they have been forgiven by God for whatever transgression has been enjoyed, and it is those who do not accept that a person has received the forgiveness of God who are the ones at fault for the sin of judging another.

This allow people to do what they want for whatever reason they want, even if it is harmful to others, and leaves them to announce that God in His infinite love has chosen to forgive them, although, He doesn’t seem all that concerned with cleaning up the damage that might have been done.

Politicians love this tactic as they will appeal to a base that may find out they are guilty of the very thing their proposed legislation is intended to stop, and will simply announce they have God’s forgiveness, or even that they had been overtaken by Satan, and now that they have self-exorcised him from their lives, are free, and should be forgiven by their constituents.

Then it’s off again to the spiritual vending machine if they do exactly what they enjoy doing, even if they know the action will offend their base.

They will announce God’s forgiveness as often as they need to, sometimes within moments of the act.

Then of course, there are those other approaches.

One is to apologize to anyone who took offense as that way you don’t have to be sorry, but those to whom you apologize need to do a little soul searching as they are guilty of making you feel guilty.

The victim becomes the victimizer, and you get off free.

You aren’t sorry for what you said and did, but that others are guilty of being offended.

The other is to broadly apologize, but then blame someone else for making you do it, like, say, Satan.

What’s rare is when all the various forms of apology are employed all at once to make sure all ground is covered like they were after the Georgia high school principal and school founder named Nancy Gordeuk launched into a racist tirade against the graduates at a recent high school graduation ceremony.

Her apology on local news reports included.

“God has forgiven me.”
“The devil was in the house.”
“I told my husband it didn’t sound like me or even feel like me saying it.”
“I’m sorry this gotten all blown out of proportion.”

Yep, she got it all covered, except, as is so common, the words “I’m sorry” or, I made a mistake” were avoided.

She would make a fine politician.

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